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My midddle son gave me a book (Historic India, a Time/Life book). The author posits that the Indian caste
system developed as a coping mechanism for absorbing a constant and diverse stream of immigrant groups,
each with fully developed societies, from primative to quite advanced, over the many millenia that
India has been inhabited. Separate social/cultural/religious/economic societies could exist side by
side with an attitude of 'you don't get in my face, I won't get in yours'. Each time a new group
drifted in, it became a caste with it own 'niche' of expertise and power. What does this unbelievably
condensed and simplified snippet have to do with the wedding? Read on...you're gonna love this one.
It truly illustrates the richness of human creativity in dealing with any adversity.
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There is an unusual sort of a caste associated with weddings and births. Those few unfortunates
that are born hermaphrodites are abandoned by their own families as babies and thrown to the mercies
of this caste. As adults they are refused work and shunned by society. It has always been thus.
However, back in the mists of time, they carved a unique niche for themselves. They are the most
creative extortionists I have ever heard of.
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Somehow, they are believed to be able to bless or curse a happy occasion. No one knows where they get
their information, but at every wedding, or birth, or other happy occasion
they show up at the door en mass wearing the most outlandish and garish of woman's clothing, their
normal attire. They haggle loudly for their bribe. They threaten to curse the family. The sing lewd
songs, dance in a disgustingly suggestive manner and generally misbehave in such an embarrassing
and aggresively outrageous manner that they are frightening. They will barricade the door and block the
exit of everyone in the house. One is under siege until the tribute is paid. No matter how threatening
they are, no one, including the police, will make a move to stop them. Most are afraid of their curses,
or of refocusing their attentions on the houses of those trying to drive them away. The police refuse to
interfere, saying that this is their right by long established custom. These people are prepared to stay as
long as it takes to come to an agreement. It's a lucrative job...for a few minutes work they got
a few thousands of ruppes out of us. It took them about thirty minutes to shake us down. Everyone pays.
Eventually, one will do anything to make them go away. Everyone pays.
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(Side Note: Now, while all this was going
on at our house, I was sort of trapped upstairs, as the sight of my white hair and pink skin would drive
the price of the bribe up considerabley, for as everyone knows, 'firengies' (Urdu for foreigner,
for all you Trek fans) have oodles of spare money. So, all this yelling and shouting is going on
downstairs and I can't get anyone to translate or tell me just what suggestive manner they danced,
for fear of offending my virginal ears, I suppose...nuts!)
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My nephew, the groom, has devoted part of his website to stories showing the creative of use of things
for purposes for which they were never designed for. An example would be using an old bedsheet to move
piles of leaves. It's cheap, efficient and creative. He calls it his "Jugard?" or 'Junkyard'. What does
this have to do with the 'girls'? It seems that the government of the State of Bihar, in east India, has
been plagued recently by a huge number of tax evaders. Some inventive soul at the local IRS came up with
the idea of hiring the 'girls', at a hefty twenty-five percent commission, to act as tax collectors. By
all accounts, this has proved a most effective way to collect back taxes, a marvelously pragmatic
'junkyard' application, don't you think? Considering how they always seem to know where the action is,
perhaps the Indian Intellegence Service should consider a side contract as well.
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A most interesting profession.
